According to those who care about me (yeah, yeah, oxymoron) I spend an inordinate amount of time at Staples Center from October to May each year. I mean, who wouldn’t? Kings, Lakers, concerts. There’s also the Clippers, but no one cares.

Today I’m back at Staples Center—media pass in hand—to cover the unveiling of former Lakers superstar Shaquille O’Neal. If you’re not a basketball fan, you still might know him as the player with the most noms de plume in the history of sports:

-The Big Aristotle
-Diesel
-Shaq Daddy
-Wilt Chamberneezy
-Big Shaqtus
-Superman
-Big Shamrock

Statue unveiling are seldom worthy of a blog column or covering other to see stars are breathe the same air they breathe. I’ve covered some of the Hollywood Walk of Fame Ceremonies…Jennifer Aniston, Katy Perry, Kate Winslet, LL Cool J, Jeff Lynne, and more…but I always dream of a ceremony like the time Clubber Lang mocked Rocky Balboa in Rocky III. Lang was desperate to get Rocky into the ring and started insulting Adrian:

Then it was on. Well, kind of. *-See the clip below to see how to call out someone at a press conference or a statue unveiling. Yet, I digress…

Shaquille O’Neal with his new statue.

Shaq (also a nickname) became the latest Lakers legend to be honored in sculpture form at the Staples Center. Fellow Lakers legends Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Phil Jackson, Jerry West, and Kobe Bryant joined the fun at an unveiling ceremony, during which the imposing 1,000 pound statue was formally revealed.

This isn’t any statue, it’s possible the greatest statue in the history of sports tributes.

The mammoth sculpture depicts O’Neal pulling down a basketball rim as a freshly-dunked ball drops through through the rippling net. At almost nine feet tall, the statue is just a bit larger than Shaq himself. It’s only fitting that Shaq be honored in bronze. Lakers president Jeanie Buss pointed out that O’Neal broke ground for Staples Center in 1998 and was the leader of a team that brought the venue’s its first three titles.

This is the eighth statue honoring a Los Angeles sports icon to be unveiled at the Staples Center’s Star Plaza—though O’Neal is one of the few to have actually played in the building.

Shaq Ceremony Highlights:

* – Clubber Lang provokes Rocky Balboa at his own statue ceremony:

Luc Robitaille / Los Angeles Kings

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar / Los Angeles Lakers

Oscar De La Hoya

Jerry West / Los Angeles Lakers

Sorry…didn’t cover this one…Wayne Gretzky / / Los Angeles Kings

Marge Hearn with her late husband’s statue…Chick Hearn / Los Angeles Lakers

Magic Johnson / Los Angeles Lakers

Sorry, didn’t cover this one either…Los Angeles Kings 50th Anniversary

The post Statue Unveilings appeared first on Media Guy Struggles.

I’m at the LA Art Show rubbing elbows with Oscar-winner Anne Hathaway and Natasha Henstridge, the alien goddess from Species. Getting here was another story. The traffic from Hollywood to the

dilapidated convention center in Downtown Los Angeles was nothing short of terrifying frustration. I mean, really? 58 minutes to go 5.5 miles? Sheesh! And that’s not counting the 22 minutes I spent at one of our new Dunkin’ Donuts with a winding line of coffee hipsters.

Once upon a time strolling into your local cafe or McDonald’s or food truck to get a cup of inspirational joe to jump start your creative process was simple. You ordered it black or cream and sugar slapped a George Washington on the counter and sauntered out with contented smile to greet your mountain of work. Since when did getting coffee become such an ordeal?

Like many of America’s problems, this one is rooted in a common theme: too much variety. Of course, you can get any of these varieties:

…and this doesn’t include the Frappuccinos and the food…yet I digress.

I finally make it to the front of the line and I ask for a large coffee and the I’m asked, “Iced or Hot?” Now I’m as open-minded as the next guy, but I recoiled. “Allow me to give you a quick tutorial…” I whispered. “The day ‘hot’ is not the default assumption for a cup of coffee is the day I drive over a cliff Thelma & Louise style. I would no sooner ask you for an iced coffee than I would sit down at Ruth’s Chris and ask the waiter for a frozen steak and point.” At that point the young lady behind the counter was near tears as she suggested I leave.

So I drove to a Starbucks where their drink menu is even more absurdly huge and I’m forced to change my vocabulary to Italian. Small is tall, medium is grande and large is venti. The twentysomething couple in front of me ordered a caramel praline Frappuccino with three pumps of mocha, a pumpkin spice loaf slice and two straws. They probably could have heard me roll my eyes but they were too busy talking about buying a new outfit for their beagle.

A rendering of Shaq’s sweet bronze statue to be.

Not a soul in that Starbucks was ordering a regular coffee but me. I felt as if I walked into a Nordstrom and asked where I could buy a pair of dungarees and a straw hat. The barista asked me my name to write on the cup and I told it was “Exasperated.”

I did strike up an interesting conversation while waiting for my coffee that required a pour-over since they were out of regular coffee. The lady in front of me noted that only in LA could people come together after parting so acrimoniously. Under the heading of “reunited and it feels so good,” the master media manipulator of NBA past, Shaquille O’Neal, and the Los Angeles Lakers has reconciled. Thanks to the Lakers and AEG, the Diesel is getting a bad-ass stature at Staples Center some time during the 2016-2017 season. At least there’s free wi-fi, right?

What happened to the regular cup of coffee? Let’s invest in a red can of Folgers or a blue can of Maxwell House and not worry if the beans were picked by a kid making ten cents a day. Pour that black gold into a ceramic glazed 22-ounce mug and celebrate the simplicity of inspirational caffeine.

How foolish of me to have wasted all that time shopping for some java. The convention had a Starbucks one escalator ride down from the main entrance at the art show. It justs goes to show you, inspiration is everywhere!

A pregnant Anne Hathaway rocked the red carpet seventies style…

…with a mini Marc Jacobs dress and Miu Miu sandals.

Natasha Henstridge still among the finest Species at any event.

Ever find that diamond Billy Zane?

Ever catch Odette Annable in Banshee? You should.

Kathleen Robertson is a hidden treasure.

Perrey Reeves sparkled.

Oh Donna…Sarah Rafferty aka Donna Paulsen from Suits has the best walk in Hollywood.

The post In Search of Coffee and Art appeared first on Media Guy Struggles.